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Thursday, October 17, 2024

If Dozerfleet had its own version of Deadpool and Wolverine

Due to the nature of the Percolation Warriors saga, it's entirely possible for a Dozerfleet equivalent of Deadpool and Wolverine to exist - without ever using either Marvel character.

Sure, the Deadpool part of the equation would prove difficult, given Percolation Warriors is set after the death of MODM. However, MODM also was at one point going to be in a story called MODM: Reckoning, which had a similar plot to Thor: Ragnorak. In that story, MODM had to save MascotWorld from the Ultimate Meme Destroyer, an evil clone of Rick Astley, who had employed Insanity Wolf, Lucky Leprechaun, and the Jollibee as his minions. MODM was aided by Leonidas, Tide Pod Chan, Tay Zonday, Eduard Khil, Ugandan Knuckles, Overly Manly Man, Dat Boi, and (oddly enough) AoStH Robotnik. While Leonidas being helpful was no surprise, the surprise best backup warrior was Tide Pod Chan - desperate to be known for something other than getting eaten by morons.

So who could possibly replace MODM? Ideally, like with Deadpool and Wolverine, it'd have to be someone who can't die easily. Cornert Mindoche would be a little young. However, with some borrowed Remotach from Earth-G7.2.1, Candace "Lemon Witch" Mason could fill in the role of being the goofy world-hopper on such an adventure. She certainly wouldn't be as invincible as Deadpool, nor as vulgar. Give her some bladed weapons, and she could perform some of Wolverine's role as well. She could work in a pinch.

As for the serious teammate? The nearest equivalent to Deadpool in gunplay would be Plum Bixie, who would also be the closest personality match for Wolverine. Selling it as a female-led story would be tricky; but Percolation Warriors: Plum x Lemon could theoretically work as a Deadpool and Wolverine knockoff. If they can't defeat the new enemy with just the two of them, it could be made a trio. Maddening Rod could join them. To make sure all three of the Big Three universe families are represented, Kayla Tarington from the Knights of Cortascius could tag along - making them a core team of four.

Candace would be struggling with the fact that she gets bored easily. Zize? With the fact that she's afraid springing into action could lead to Inner Fox taking over her mind again. She doesn't want to undergo yet another exorcism, with Cherinob inside her head, ever again.

Who would be the villain?

As usual, licensing would be key. However, it's possible that a mishap with the Multiversal Triumvirate could lead to the Percolation Wave cloning Cerato right before he died, leading to an ascended Cerato. This rogue Cerato, desperate for a chance at relevance, would steal an entire transport vessel from under the Triumvirate, and use it to create his own separate universe - the Backlot (similar to the Void.)

Inside the Backlot, Cerato would use his stolen Triumvirate tech to make himself a veritable demigod among the residents. It wouldn't be paradise; but it wouldn't be a Mad Max-style wasteland either. He'd gather random Ice Chimps, Gwirdon Treaders, and others he'd captured and enslaved to become his servants. This would also include bringing Miscarriage the Stork back from the dead, resurrecting Oxymoron the Bull, resurrecting Shakesbear, resurrecting Uwchfiol, and resurrecting the Christina Wade version of Microwave Mouth. Anyone who puts up too much of a struggle gets fed to a clone of Salt the Raging Hamster.

In time, his plan would be to build his machine up so that he could start pruning from within the Divergency any timeline that he felt he could absorb energy from in order to grow his own power. He especially wanted to delete Earth-G7.2.9, to get revenge on the ascended Tanya Woven for having the nerve to humiliate his variant.

After careful analysis, Plum Bixie would be chosen to go after him - with help from Lemon Witch. Zize's being very hard to kill, combined with Candace's general unpredictability and remarkable talents, would make them a formidable duo for distracting Cerato long enough to sabotage the machine - leading to Cerato destroying himself.

The scariest plot twist? The girls must also visit every world Cerato has visited, and de-fuse a bomb of his from going off. If it goes off, it's set to target the Bootes Void. Cerato believes that if the Bootes Void in enough universes gets attacked, the feedback could unlock Earth-G7.0.0 - allowing Cerato to locate Pele and free her from the Bootes Void. A revived Pele would automatically create a multiversal crisis that would require Cherinob, Radjuatt, Soetera, and the rest of the Angelic Army to fix. Cerato would get mocked for having a similar evil plan to that of the Spot in Across the Spiderverse - until he points out how his intention to negotiate with Pele would actually make everything even worse.

Not wishing for a repeat of Cherinob 3; Zize, Candace, Kayla, and Carly would wish to fight back against Cerato and his army. However, they'd need allies. And that's when they discover the resistance in the Backlot:

The Resistance

While they were mostly there as a joke in Deadpool and Wolverine, fans rejoiced heavily to see Elektra, Human Torch, and especially Blade return to the silver screen after over a decade of irrelevance. A Dozerfleet version of that resistance could look like the following, and would really sell this story:

  • A clone of Replox: Created when Cerato unsuccessfully attacked the world of Replox: Abstract Foundations. He was bounced back out by the Wave, but not before creating a clone of Kevin Mend. The clone lives in constant pain, as he and the original Kevin share the same Abstri-Matrix. He's willing to die for the cause of dethroning Cerato. Not only because he feels it's the right thing to do; but also because he wants to be set free from the fact that two versions of Kevin on the same Abstri-Matrix bond are not supposed to exist.
  • Pollo Dehielo: Nearly everything about him has been forgotten, except for the fact that he's man in a chicken suit that makes ice. He gets a little tired of being called "Cold Chicken Batman."
  • Cyberpunk Volkonir: A clone of the prince that first got displaced into a cyberpunk world, then got abducted into the Backlot by Cerato. In spite the progress his upgraded cyberpunk Golden Lion Knight armor helped him achieve in the cyberpunk world, he was unable to make much progress against the upgraded Cerato.
  • A clone of Earth-G4 Ciem: Transported to a world where only shreds of her original Ciem suit from Imaki remained. A strange Zeranite pocket dimension she's connected to allows her to hide her 32 absurdly-long tentacle centilegs inside her body, which confuse the Percolation Warriors due to the fact that the Ciem they're familiar with has ten tiny centilegs and relies more heavily on Zeran teleportation to get around.

    This Candi never got to marry Donte, never got to save Denny Levens, barely managed to save her world from the Hebbleskin Gang and Arfaas' Doomsday Ship, struggled to get over the death of her daughter Angie, had no idea if her sister Miriam were okay, and generally felt like a failure at everything. Before finding the others, she felt very alone inside the forested and mountainous Purgatory-like Backlot. She especially feared Cerato, as Cerato seemed particularly intent on showing malice toward all versions of Ciem. She's aware that many consider the Earth-G7.2.1 version of her to be markedly superior, making her feel that much more like a failure.
  • Redundant Man: Not afraid to die for the cause anymore, Redundant Man after stopping Professor Jargon's Duckzilla monster plan soon found himself and Detective Red Herring trapped in the Backlot. Red was among the first to be killed by Cerato, though he dreams of the day he can avenge his friend.
  • Mutt Mackley: Desperate to get home once more, he remembers the time he lived inside Charlotte Duvarin's dorm wardrobe at Ferris State. He struggles with the fact that no one takes him seriously, given he's the size of a hand puppet - and somewhat resembles one.
  • Jessie Morcin: The cancellation of Kozerlen saw her quickly fade out of relevance. However, she returns in this story looking for redemption. Even after getting past Corvin the Caller, and dismantling much of the Kozerlen conspiracy, she was no closer to learning the truth about her husband's disappearance than when she started. And after a decade, she was ready to give up. However, she knew she'd never finish the job if she couldn't escape the Backlot. The Percolation Warriors get confused by her appearance at first, noting that she bears an eerie resemblance to Monica Shelly.

Searching for transportation, they find Hilo, Ackro, and Colly from When Bikes Argue inside the Backlot. However, Ackro's rear axle snaps, rendering him useless. Colly gets sacrificed to shield Jessie from an attack by Miscarriage. Hilo survives, but proves to be of little use to the team. Barry the Car proves unusable, given his brake lines being corroded to uselessness.

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